the sum of all things: how I healed my pcos.

when was the last time you woke up feeling well?

As I opened my eyes this morning I assessed how I was feeling. You know, that moment when you learn how well you slept despite having caffeine a little too late the day before, or whether your dinner feels good on your body twelve hours later. I’ve grown to be fascinated by this moment and the spectrum of variables that contribute to what it means to feel well.

In my last post I shared everything that contributed to my PCOS and this week I want to share the sum of all things that contributed to my healing. These are the things that brought me home to myself… the things that supported me in feeling well again. Consider this outline a birdseye view of the past five years and an introduction to the topics I’m going to dive deeper into as I continue to write on this platform.

the four bodies.

I’m grouping the inputs of my holistic healing journey into the four bodies: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual/energetic. It felt less overwhelming to my brain this way and it is an accurate representation of how I approached the balancing act of healing.

This breakdown is in no particular order; however, the order in which I brought these healing modalities into my life mattered. I’ll talk about sequencing in a future post but for now, know that your intuition is all-knowing of what is right for you. This list is simply what worked for me. Arriving at the sum of all things was a process of experimentation and failure.

As you read, pay attention to any pings or intuitive whispers saying “we should try this one.”

Before absorbing the content below, two notes:

1. You can have all of the resources in the world but if you do not have consistent rest, nutrition, movement, and presence with yourself then the rate at which your body will accept and benefit from these offerings diminishes significantly.

2. I do not believe in labeling things (foods, tools, practices, etc.) as right or wrong. There is only what is right for you and what is wrong for you and your individual needs.

Start with the basics, lay a strong foundation for yourself, and build from there. These are the building blocks that brought ease and alignment back into my life and body one practice at a time…

physical body.

• food and gut health

  • eating intuitively, seasonally, and locally

  • prioritizing variety in my diet - I made a ritual of going to the farmer’s market and built relationships with a few farmers which encouraged more diversity on my plate and thus in my microbiome.

  • eliminating gluten, dairy, and processed sugar for a period of time to reduce inflammation in my gut

  • ayurveda - understanding my unique makeup through the lens of doshas and the “science of life” was a game changer. I feel like I’ve only scratched the surface here. Melissa Maxwell shed so much light on this source of ancient wisdom and helped me to understand my body’s unique needs better.

  • reintroducing meat after being vegan for 2 years

  • daily apple cider vinegar diluted in warm water

• blood sugar regulation

  • once I understood that insulin resistance was part of the root cause of my PCOS I learned how to incorporate bitters, vinegars, after meal walks, and food pairing to stabilize and support healthy blood sugar levels.

  • a1c testing - this became a key biomarker to watch as a nondiabetic woman with mild development of insulin resistance

• supplements to support my systems and reduce inflammation in my body at the guidance of my functional medicine doctor

  • eliminating bad bacteria in my gut: olive leaf extract and activated charcoal

  • glandular supplements - this may have been the single most significant supplement I took

  • magnesium

  • turmeric

  • chaste tree

  • spirulina

  • progesterone cream - I used this one made from yams to support progesterone production during my luteal phase

• cortisol regulation

  • switching from coffee to matcha changed my life

  • learning to recognize signs of fight or flight in my body and self-soothe

• yoga and low-impact strength training workouts

• removing my IUD after 5 years with a Paragard copper IUD

• focus on elimination

  • lymphatic stimulation / dry brushing to eliminate toxins from my body

  • seasonal liver cleanses with herbal teas to remove excess hormones stored in my liver

  • replacement of toxic products (household, makeup, processed foods, etc.)

  • increased fiber » daily bowel movements

• cycle syncing (once my cycle returned in June 2023)

• seeking pleasure, having a healthy sex life, and honoring my desires

• supporting my circadian rhythm

spiritual/energetic body.

• mindful consumption

  • every day is made up of a series of inputs/outputs. I made little tweaks. more reading, less screen time. more time in the sun, less time in the air conditioning. more slow mornings with nowhere to be, less alarm clocks jolting me out of bed. I learned to love on my nervous system differently with inputs that welcomed ease and regulation and outputs that supported release.

• acupuncture

  • I tried this too early in my journey. I’m a believer in the power of acupuncture and supporting the flow of chi in the body to find balance; however, I brought acupuncture into my journey at a time when my gut health and external environment weren’t complimentary to accepting the full benefits of acupuncture.

• cultivation of feminine energy

• breathwork

• lunar cycle tracking

• grounding, earthing, forest bathing… whatever you want to call it, I spent a lot of time in the trees.

• composting

  • call me crazy but after my trip to the Sacred Valley of Peru in 2022 (maybe 2021?) I was convinced that having a daily sustainability practice connects you to the natural cycle of life and will heal parts of you that would otherwise go unseen. living in accordance with Mother Earth / Pachamama welcomes presence and a sense of oneness into your days.

emotional body.

• NET (neuro-emotional technique)

  • identifying and releasing stored emotions in the body with the help of Dr. Kim

• a little talk therapy

• daily journaling / gratitude practice

• crying… a lot

  • I learned how to lean into hard emotions, feel them, and release them. there’s a powerful contraction of your diaphragm when crying (or laughing) that supports the body in letting go of stagnant energy.

• plant medicines (this goes under all four bodies when I think about it…)

  • psilocybin (both micro-dosing and larger doses) that aided in working with unhealthy patterns and traumas being held in my subconscious

  • smoking weed (more later on how to leverage this as a tool for intentional release and healing as opposed to numbing or distracting)

• learning when something is a “yes” in my body and speaking from center (get you a copy of Untethered Soul to find your way to the seat of self)

• watering relationships that feel aligned / releasing those that do not

  • this one is so important: having two people you can say anything to and be met with unconditional love

  • having a strong support system and community in healing

• unlearning the patterns of stress and overwhelm that my body became chemically addicted to since my childhood

mental body.

• meditation (this was one of the very first healing tools I found in 2018 that stuck)

  • learning about quantum physics and the power of meditation through the work of Joe Dispenza

  • having a vision of my future self (10 minutes well spent)

  • learning to just be (start here)

• acceptance of self

• music, music, music… harnessing the power of the throat chakra

• learning new things thus creating new neural pathways and clearing out old ones that no longer served me

• understanding how my food choices uniquely affected my mental health and mood

• having purpose and aligning with work that lights me up

  • over the course of the five years that I focused on healing and aligning with my true self I left my 9-5 and followed my passion for photography. it’s hard to quantify and explain how this healed me but I know that it was an essential part of loving myself and falling in love with my life. it was an essential part of my rebirth.

  • on the side I also started hosting workshops that help other people align with their north stars in the pursuit of a more purposeful life through the art of Ikigai. this helped me to rebuild my confidence and trust in myself to add value to my community

• boundaries

  • everything changed for me when my good friend, Alex Elle, taught me one day over tea that boundaries are not a way of keeping people further away but rather boundaries are meant to express to someone, “I can best love you from here.” —oof. That reframe changed my life.

The last building block I would add to this list that doesn’t quite fit into any category is time. This could be translated into having patience in the process but in my story it looked like honoring the natural cycles of life and rebirth. Many moons passed when I questioned if my period would ever return and the cysts in my body would dissolve. It was during these cycles that my love for myself and my trust in an intelligence greater than my individual self deepened.

are we still talking about cysts?

As I reread this post before pushing publish I questioned if I should change the title to "the sum of all things: how I healed my life” instead of “how I healed my PCOS.” Some may be wondering what breathwork and boundaries have to do with healing the cysts on my ovaries. Here’s what is true: PCOS was the thing that forced me to look into my shadow and be honest about how I am showing up for myself. It revealed the parts of me that needed to be loved the most. It taught me how to accept myself more fully. It showed me how to stop betraying myself in minor ways that manifested as misalignment in major areas of my life.

Sometimes things have to break in order to heal; and I can say with certainty that my journey with PCOS broke me. It brought me toe-to-toe with my deepest fears of not feeling safe in my body, not loving the skin I’m in, and questioning if I would be able to have children. It was from those depths and dark nights that I found a path back to my own light. I found balance again.

No matter what you may be experiencing in your physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual/energetic bodies it always brings me comfort to remember that nature will always seek balance. It’s our job to support ourselves through the process and be present with all that helps us to feel well.

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I’m curious, when was the last time you woke up feeling well? Do you know what contributes to your unique well-being?